POCs: Resist Anglicizing Your Name
Everyone else: learn to start learning it.
Hi! My name’s Vrisha. How’d you say it in your head when your eyes glossed over it? Did you say it like “Vreesha?” If you did, that’s the most common way my name is said! *sigh* But it’s not right. It’s pronounced like “Vrih-sha.” Don’t worry if you said it differently, this mispronunciation has occurred literally countless times in my life that I’ve come out with my own little catchy phrase to tell people how to say it correctly:
It’s Vrisha, like Trisha.
I bet you clearly know how to say it now.
There’s no particular reason why my parents gave me this name, and that’s a story for another time. While I’m aware that name mispronunciations can occur to anyone, I’ve seen it most amongst people of color like myself.
For a very brief background, anglicizing means to “to make English in quality or characteristics” or “to adapt (a foreign word, name, or phrase) to English usage” according to Merriam-Webster. Anglicizing names among POC just means making a ‘foreign-sounding’ name into a name more attuned to the typical English language. Think Ramón becoming Raymond. Or Shailee becoming Shelley. Anyone know the incident with the unruly college Professor asking a student to change their name because it sounded like an English insult?
I’ve known countless friends who have given up on trying to get others to understand their name. On other accounts, I’ve heard stories from friends who tell me their parents outright named them something English-sounding from birth or changed their name in childhood to prevent bullying. On an even sadder note, I’ve heard stories from friends telling me that their parents made their name less ethnic/foreign so that they would “fit in” more and even be considered for jobs faster because employers tend to subconsciously favor those with more Eurocentric names.
When I was younger, I was lucky enough to be around kids that never really mispronounced or disrespected my name. As I grew up, though, I experienced a sort of culture-shock when suddenly many teachers kept screwing up my name and never made an effort to remember it. I have been called Vreesha, Vrishna, Vishra, Varisha, Krishna, Russia, and Risha. Most recently in an email, I was called Viraj, quickly followed up by an apology email where they, unfortunately, made another mistake and called me Virsha instead. On the rare occasion I’ve ordered Starbucks, they’ve called me Rashan and Drasha — they even asked me to spell it out the second time. And it’s alright, you can laugh at any of those, I do too now. In class, I’ve been confused for other Indian girls and had many awkward moments with teachers giving them back assignments with another Indian girl’s name on it. I’d correct them many times at the start of the year, but sometimes it wouldn’t stick. Occasionally, they’d catch themselves messing up and apologize to me repeatedly, which I always appreciated.
Out of all this annoyance, the silver lining here is knowing when my name is coming up on a class roster. Once I see a substitute teacher take a brief little pause reading the list, I just know I’m next, and I took joy in that too. It’s like having a spider-sense being able to raise my hand to say “here” before they even mumble out a variation of my name. Of course this ‘silver-lining’ isn’t really a benefit or anything too fancy, but I mean, what else am I to do but make jokes about things that bother me? It was, at times, funny to hear outrageous mispronunciations, but it was mostly frustrating and led me to just give up on trying, usually settling for whatever mispronunciation comes my way.
Jokes aside, names are a major part of one’s identity, and when it is disrespected, it is understandable why it’s such a big deal. Some have insanely personal, historical meanings. Others give people independence, especially when they make the decision to change it themselves. Sometimes, a name just has such crazy memories and stories tied to it, that it sticks forever. The saddest and perhaps most frustrating part of all of this is that so much change can occur if people just tried a little harder to learn these names. And when I say ‘people’ I’m not just referring to anyone who isn’t POC, fellow POC should make the effort too. We especially know how it feels.
- Instead of taking a billion guesses and saying it wrong each time, just ask how to say it, and truly try to remember it. Not good with names? Ask again! And again, and again, and again if you must! I know I’d for sure appreciate the effort and respect that person a lot more for just asking me how my name is said and showing that they care.
- If you have kids, raise them to respect others’ names. It’s appalling how much children mock other kids for their foreign names. Kids will be kids, yes, but as adult figures in their life, the very least you can do is correct it and teach them right.
- This shouldn’t have to be said, but please, NEVER ask them to anglicize or change their name for your personal comfort. That’s just flat out discrimination.
- Check your biases! Regardless of skin color/race/background, as humans we all act subconsciously. Sometimes we don’t even realize when we do so with some prejudiced or discriminatory biases we’ve known our whole lives. Checking yourself and maybe what makes it difficult to learn a foreign name or want them to change it for you can help you catch discriminatory mindsets you didn’t even know you might’ve had towards something as seemingly small as a name.
It is so important that we keep our names and stand strong in letting others learn it. Names carry a sense of pride, identity, and character, and when we disrespect it, we disrespect the human that comes with it.
To my fellow POC — we have to stop bending to others and show strength and pride in our names. We have to make others learn it and get used to it because we deserve to love our cultures and take up space.
Thanks for reading my little name rant! These are just some thoughts I’ve formed from my observation and experience. Let me know your thoughts, stories, observations, and experiences in the comments!
